zeus was mad.

moonburn.

cange, haiti.

12 May 2009

Two nights ago, we sat on the edge of the balcony here in Cange and watched the tropical storm moving across the horizon right behind our mountains. Shooting stars streaked across the sky of the humid night, and lightning did muted battle with the clouds. And we sat in stunned silence as bolt after bolt lit up the towering clouds in a furious array of silent fireworks, from which we were distracted only as the meteors fell to earth in competition for our attention.

And thankfully, for once in my life, I listened. Pradip held out his beer can and said, 

"Will, it's a bit like this beer can. If you pour it all out, the can will be empty before you're ready. And if you hold on to it too tightly, you will crush it, and it will all spill out anyway. But if you just hold it lightly and steadily, like this, you will have it when you need it, and you can take from it when you will. So you just have to sometimes let it go, and set it down, like this..." 

He was talking about my time in Africa last year. And how sometimes it hurts the people I love most when I hold on to it too tightly, afraid to let it go, and eager to revisit it constantly. Both done because during that time, life felt meaningful. Like I had purpose and fulfillment and passion and love, all at the same time. 

Wise, wise words. Letting go has always been the hardest thing for me, and it keeps coming up. But now right now today here this moment.is.beautiful. And to continue Pradip's metaphor, when you're holding on to the beer can too tightly in the one hand (even the Prestige), it's easy to miss the Rhum Barbancourt in the other. Since I go to Sewanee, I'm sure it'll be hard to live that one down. Chuckle. 

After he said that, he silently stood up and went to bed, and I sat, still watching zeus' fury behind the mountains...sitting praying thinking. about letting go. So Kenya, Congo, Bunyonyi, I'll be back soon. But right now, I'm here with you, Haiti. 

And next week, LA, here I come. 

keep blowing the whistles.

for peace.will.

"Our contemplation is our life. It is not a matter of doing but being. [...] We shall not waste our time in looking for extraordinary experiences in our life of contemplation but live by pure faith, ever watchful, [...] doing our day-to-day duties with extraordinary love and devotion."

-Mother Teresa