waves.

california. 

golden summer sunbeams glinting through the clouds. sky turns pink. sand between my toes. tide crashes in. LA lights down the beach. planes taking off. the breakwater breaks. waves launch upward and man i gotta learn how to surf. 

water runs up around my feet. and i dream about the lands across that ocean, wondering what they thought when they didn't know what lay across the horizon, those other lands on the other side of the world. they didn't know. but i do. and i wanna go there. 

and the ocean's breathing real salty tonight. you can feel it on your face, in your hair. on your skin. smell it laced in the air. that sea smell. 

and look up at the stars. think 'bout distant lands brings distant yous to mind. we breathed the salty together. 

where are you now? 

you know how the waves crash, and the surf roars and the birds beating their wings overhead and the wind in your ears drowns out all thought and all imagining... you know? but then that moment of beautiful silence. the peace. waves stop for only a moment. wind dies. and in that moment, the ocean is still, and everything goes white. clear. just a glimpse of the light. 

then crash. 

les miserables.

freedom. sometimes words just can't express the deepest emotions of the human heart. the deepest beauty. the deepest pain. the deepest love. can't even come close. 

"jean valjean, you are free."

long live the revolution.

freedom. 

you got eyes.

drivin'drivin' cross the usa cross the usa. big mountains little towns colors cross the sky cross the sky. independence pass and you're weaving turning up and around and around 12,000 ft top of the world it seems. point where rivers meet and break up. you go this way i go mine. 

walk cross the snow cross the snow in my chacos watch the skiers in may cross the mount cross the mount. keep drivin'drivin' down down follow the river rages in white water all the way down. all.the.way.down. keep drivin'drivin' oh this is aspen and it's something new. oh how it's something new. look at those streets with those shops and those girls dressed up in summer sun summer sun. strands of hair you shine on me in summer sun. shine on me. shine on me. 

through the speakers comes edge blazin' through those strings and we're singing in god's country in god's country. look at the map joshua tree too far south so we just listen 'cuz it still fits out here as green hills of aspen turn to open lands. 

drivin'drivin' cross the usa cross the usa. utah. sign for moab. big sky country, that's what this is and the clouds just go up up up into blue. sky so blue it's just right there at my fingertips. that's what it is. cross the barren lands and now into river valley. might colorado goes on forever red-brown water red-brown hills this is america. i mean, this is america. and i'm alive. oh so alive. arches national park and red arches stand up and grab the sky the sky but fall back down locked into rock forever. down through mountains, deserts, deserts, deserts endless lands forsaken by man and beast alike. but still, life everywhere. that's it. life everywhere. spinnin' horizons. skew the frame. don't listen to them. do something new. that's what the sky told me. that's what she told me. she's gotta be a she. because she's beautiful and i want her. i want her. this is what i dream about on nights layin up and looking deep lookin deep cross the sky cross the sky. 

then camp. 

cream of wheat and moving again. cross the mount cross the mount down into valley and this is Zion National Park and sandstone cliffs grab grab grab for something up there. something outside of us. outside of me. mountain lion country. i'm imagining him there, silhouetted against that same blue that same blue. in god's country again. but eddie, you sing, you sing that it's a big hard sun but we ain't goin' back no more no more. nomorenomorenomore. we singin' no more. pool against cliffs. too many people. 

"they try to tear the mountains down, to bring in a couple more. 

more people, more scars across the land." -john denver

nevada desert. shiny mirrors blinding me. city in a desert? who thought 'o that? crazy people, we americans. americans we. vegas shines and screams it's mantra... screams screams it. 

cross the sand cross the sand. california baby. baby come with me california. new state and mountains turn be hills be green be hazed.in smog. LA huge oh so big. but no more crossin' usa crossin' usa this the end, man, this the end. so rad. beach and surf and sunset on an ocean. now that's new. land face west and go west no more young man. you gone west and here you are the end of the road venice beach baby that's where we are. 

i told me (myself and i) gonna change the world, man, we gonna change the world. you say no, but man i believe we gonna change the world. that love gonna come set me free set me free man. free we gonna be free no matter what it takes 'cuz we were born to run. cuz they ain't no reason man they ain't no reason that things gonna stay this way. now we gonna blow these whistles round our necks round our necks. this ain't just america man. it's the world. and it's beautiful this world this world. we're here and we're alive and we can see. you got eyes baby. you got eyes. 

"Robert Frank, Swiss, unobtrusive, nice with little camera that he raises and snaps with one hand he sucked a sad poem right out of America onto film, taking rank among the tragic poets of this world.

To Robert Frank I now give this message: You got eyes. "

baby you got eyes so look me in mine open mine cuz i can't see i can't see. 

for katherine.

lapli.

cange, haiti.

12 May 2009.

zeus was mad.

moonburn.

cange, haiti.

12 May 2009

Two nights ago, we sat on the edge of the balcony here in Cange and watched the tropical storm moving across the horizon right behind our mountains. Shooting stars streaked across the sky of the humid night, and lightning did muted battle with the clouds. And we sat in stunned silence as bolt after bolt lit up the towering clouds in a furious array of silent fireworks, from which we were distracted only as the meteors fell to earth in competition for our attention.

And thankfully, for once in my life, I listened. Pradip held out his beer can and said, 

"Will, it's a bit like this beer can. If you pour it all out, the can will be empty before you're ready. And if you hold on to it too tightly, you will crush it, and it will all spill out anyway. But if you just hold it lightly and steadily, like this, you will have it when you need it, and you can take from it when you will. So you just have to sometimes let it go, and set it down, like this..." 

He was talking about my time in Africa last year. And how sometimes it hurts the people I love most when I hold on to it too tightly, afraid to let it go, and eager to revisit it constantly. Both done because during that time, life felt meaningful. Like I had purpose and fulfillment and passion and love, all at the same time. 

Wise, wise words. Letting go has always been the hardest thing for me, and it keeps coming up. But now right now today here this moment.is.beautiful. And to continue Pradip's metaphor, when you're holding on to the beer can too tightly in the one hand (even the Prestige), it's easy to miss the Rhum Barbancourt in the other. Since I go to Sewanee, I'm sure it'll be hard to live that one down. Chuckle. 

After he said that, he silently stood up and went to bed, and I sat, still watching zeus' fury behind the mountains...sitting praying thinking. about letting go. So Kenya, Congo, Bunyonyi, I'll be back soon. But right now, I'm here with you, Haiti. 

And next week, LA, here I come. 

keep blowing the whistles.

for peace.will.

"Our contemplation is our life. It is not a matter of doing but being. [...] We shall not waste our time in looking for extraordinary experiences in our life of contemplation but live by pure faith, ever watchful, [...] doing our day-to-day duties with extraordinary love and devotion."

-Mother Teresa

falling.whistles.discover.the.journey.

So there's this war that most of us haven't heard about. It's pretty complex, and with it's different parts, has become the world's most deadly and longest running war. In the last eight years, at least 5.4 million people have died, a death toll not unlike that of the holocaust. 70% of the world's rapes are in this region and are a product of the instability and destruction from this war. Thousands of children have been abducted and conscripted into the rebel armies to fight in the war, children mainly between the ages of 5 and 15. 

Because of these horrors and atrocities, people are starting to wake up, and we're beginning to find out and see images and video of what's going on, here in living rooms, and on our computer screens. But the choice is ours as to whether we too will wake up and realize that there are things that are wrong in this world, and that we DO have the power to do something about them. 

Falling Whistles is an organization based in Los Angeles that is trying to expose the story of this war and someday bring an end to it. They're passionate, brilliant, and creative in the ways they're tirelessly working to combat this war and bring peace to Congo. Read the story, and their blog, at http://www.fallingwhistles.com. They've chosen the image of the whistle (you'll read about the origins of that in the story on their website) as a symbol of blowing the whistle for change. Become a whistleblower and buy a whistle. Raise awareness and blow the whistle for change. 

Discover the journey is another initiative trying to bring peace to Congo. They've got this beautiful vision of peace and they're selling sets of t-shirts. One for you to wear to raise awareness and bring a message of peace, and the other for a former child soldier in Congo to wear to be a messenger of peace in Congo. Watch the video at:http://www.discoverthejourney.org/paix/paixstore. Buy a shirt. 

Now you know. And now it's your turn to respond, which takes some effort and some work. Read the Falling Whistles story. Watch the Discovery the Journey video. It's important that you do. There's this quote from this man on the streets in Haiti that has come to define who I am: 

"If you came to help me, you are wasting your time, but if you came because you understand your liberation to be bound with mine, then let us walk together."

Read the story

and 

Watch the video

because our liberation as people in this world is bound together. 

Become a whistleblower for peace.

Love wins.

the power of one.

"The music of Africa is too wild, too free, too accustomed to death for romance. Africa is too crude a stage for the small scratching of the violin, too majestic for the piano. Africa is only right for drums. The drum carries its rhythm but does not steal its music. Timpani is the background, the music of Africa is in the voices of the people. They are its instruments, more subtle, more beautiful, infinitely more noble than the scratching, thumping, banging, and blowing of brass and vellum, strings and keyboard."

i shall be reading that book soon.